Countdown to the next  game

Match report sponsored by Specsavers

Apologies for the very rushed and late report on last Monday’s oranges versus lemons. The score was approximately 4-3 to the orange bibs or 3-2 to the lemon tabards and, at one point, there were 8 orange bibs versus 10 lemons. But no-one seemed to care. Much hilarity on the field (more of that later) and much beer in the bar.

As ever, there were a few questionable decisions by the Keef. The word “biased” was heard approx. 49 times. However, please, some sympathy for Keef as he has to explain to our illustrious Commander about the pitch surface repair bill of €792. Big Dan (we call him that because, well, he’s bloody BIG) got all giddy when he had a clear shot on goal and then 1) scuffed his shot, taking a golf sized divot out of the astroturf, and 2) promptly fell over and left a crater the size of a double bed. Car alarms went off when he hit the ground.

Terry, our new talent scout, was responsible for bring a couple of new faces, white legs and red necks this week (see pics). All said they had a good time. The “bunny-in-the-headlights” look on their faces, with 32′ C temperature, suggested otherwise 😉

It was the return of “Max vs Stuart – Duel in the Sun”. Sadly, it’s Max’s last game for a while as he returns to the frozen North. However, he finally got the better of Stuart by a score of… checks notes… 5 goals vs 3 saves which means Stuart is NOT invincible! The eagle-eyed readers will notice that score doesn’t add up however, for the benefit of the new readers, this reporter doesn’t let the truth get in the way of a good story.

“Banter Frank” set himself up for much banter by missing a few sitters but he redeemed himself with many crunching tackles, ahem.

Both Max and Irish Dave scored fantastic goals… in the wrong goal. You had to be there to understand why.

Kevo’s refereeing was exemplary for the 5 minutes he was following the game. You had to be there to understand why.

In the post-game festivities, when the newcomers asked about the club’s motto, Keef strenuously denied that this is a group of old guys that like to play football and have a beer or two afterwards. He said, “we’re a group of guys that like to drink beer after playing a game of football.”

Over and out!

Newbies!