Benalmadena 21st March

Match report by Rory 

Spider Man Lives!

The story of the day was the amazing performance in goal by George (USA! USA!) aka Spiderman. Two evenly matched teams battered each other relentlessly in the Poli’s retro indoor school gym circa 1972. Surprise of the day was big Al’s failure to get on the scoresheet for the blacks, an event so rare it’s been classified as an endangered species. Big Al developed a great partnership with Yoza which broke through the reds’ defensive lines at will. George started out up front with Simon, with the other super gloveman Breck, starting between the sticks.

While each team had an equal number of shots on target, somehow the blacks just seemed to be able to beat the reds’ keeper, regardless of who it was. On paper the reds looked equally strong, particularly as Keef had the whistle and could blow up the opposition for every minor infringement. As always, Olaf for the blacks was an energetic player who frequently confused running with walking, and wouldn’t let the small matter of someone being in front of him, stop him from getting to the ball. Martin made a welcome return to WFS and had a tidy game up front which was to yield a deserved reward later in the game. With the accident-prone Rory playing deep, the reds always looked dangerous when Keef and Dave the Owl combined well going forward. They were well supported by Steve as another holding midfielder with Billy the Fish starting in goal.

However, they hadn’t reckoned on a match-winning performance from Yoza who helped himself to a tidy hat-trick of beautifully struck rockets past an array of stunned reds’ goalies. This salvo was nicely dovetailed with USA’s finest who managed to bag a brace for himself to cap off a fine display which included a star performance in goal when he sustained a “mystery” injury. By two-thirds of the way through the game, the blacks had completely pulled the reds’ pants down, ran them up a flag pole, and set fire to them. Although the game was effectively over, the plucky reds kept going, determined to get on the score sheet. They hadn’t banked on spiderman George who hurled his body about in goal and pulled off one truly remarkable double save to deny the Owl.

Things eventually changed when George’s spell in goal remarkably cured his injury and enabled him to play in Dee-fence, before taking up his usual position up front. Finally, the spirited reds managed to get on the score-sheet with the Owl bagging the first of his two goals (43 shots on target), and brave Coventry supporter (Ed: who else would admit to it?) Martin breaking free from the defensive strangle hold of Breck and Olaf to fire one into the bottom corner. With Breck taking the ref’s whistle for the closing minutes, he went full Pierluigi Collina, and accepted a backhander of 100,000 lire to rule out the reds’ last minute goal. Fortunately, VAR ruled that the Owl had broken free and smashed the ball into the net a nanosecond before the dubious ref blew for full-time. All in all, a curious game between two evenly matched teams, with the only difference being the accuracy of the blacks’ shooting boots and a superlative farewell goalkeeping performance from the agile Yank