Benalmadena 13th January

Match report by Rory

East Fife 4 Forfar 5. What a game at the Polideportivo.

Once again, Keef had excelled himself by picking two very evenly matched teams with differing styles. The reds had set up with their traditional 4-4-3 formation with the defence and midfield orchestrated by Kevo and Steve. The blacks however adopted a more fluid style straight out of the Pep Guardiola playbook. The early exchanges were tense affairs with no one coming out on top. Glyn and (Scottish) Steve were providing some good passing movements for the blacks early on and testing out the robust reds defence, with Stuart putting in some timely tackles early on (surely the ref is going to blow him for running at some point?).

Gradually, thanks to Dave (the Owl’s) ghosting runs through the lines, the blacks were starting to exert more pressure on the red’s goal. The Commander once again was providing a strong focal point for the blues attacks, holding the ball up well with back to goal. Unfortunately, for some strange reason Steve (the chef) had put his boots on the wrong feet, and his brilliant creation of space in front of goal has resulted in nothing more than the rear fence needing to be repaired. With the increasing pressure the reds sprung the trap, and with the precision of a surgeon’s knife, they cut through the black’s defence and released Breck to bear down on the black’s hapless goalie, Rory. With a coolness of thought under pressure, Breck calmly slotted the ball past the advancing keeper. Against the run of play, the reds were ahead.

The reds had a particularly robust defence, with Stuart and Peter providing a solid wall which also had the capacity to spring into attack when required. However, the blacks knew that with Dave (conjuring the ghost of his namesake the Owl’s record goal scorer David Hurst) in their side, it would only be a matter of time before they would level the scores. Sure enough, with Glyn playing as a false number 7, Dazza playing as a false number 2, and Mick playing as a false number 9, the blacks confused not only themselves, but the reds as well. Following an intricate interplay they finally unleased Dave, who gave the goalkeeper the eyes (even through his impenetrable shades), and calmly slotted it into the net. What a finish.

But of course, the quality in the reds’ team was never going to be subdued for long. With Bambi providing some exceptional surging runs down the right flank and George providing effective penetration down the left, the reds were far from out of the game. Fortunately for the blacks, Frank was having probably one of his best games of the season, with his brilliant reading of the game, great interceptions, and calmly playing the ball out of defence. Glyn for the blacks, who had been a stand out leader on the pitch was linking well with (Scottish) Steve, who had been involved in some outstanding link-up play. Their constant probing down the red’s left flank eventually found Glyn in a yard of space in front of goal. He didn’t need to be asked twice and side-footed the ball into the goal. Surely the blacks would now run away with it?

Think again readers, any team with Kevo, Steve and Alvin wasn’t going to lie down. Dave (reds) had been a constant threat through the middle despite carrying an injury which would eventually put him in goal. Peter, was making increasing incursions down the right flank supporting Kevo who was driving the reds’ midfield further forward. The reds were not to be denied and eventually, following a great interchange of play on the edge of the blacks’ box, the energetic Alvin drove a great shot into to corner of the goal. Total Football! The reds continued to exert their dominance over this period of play, and with Steve beginning to take up more forward positions, he found himself in a position to bend a shot past the massed ranks of the blacks’ defence and bend a great shot into the top corner.

Dazza, who had been giving a brilliant impression of Roberto Carlos (circa 1970) was having the game of his life and peppering the goal with fearsome shots (Editor: has he been replaced by an Alien?). The move of the day was a combination of Keef and Dazza working the ball down the right, ending in great shot form Dazza hitting the post. It would have been goal of the season!

Alvin, (who makes Declan Rice look like a geriatric) having taken up more forward positions found himself with an opportunity to strike, just outside the box. Option 1: welly it into Rory Option 2: kick it over the bar; Option 3: drill it into the top corner. Without hesitation, he drilled it into the top corner. What a game.

The reds were starting to dominate with Steve, Kevo and George playing some fluid football through the blacks’ lines. With a sublime moment of football, the reds worked the ball out to the (always dangerous) Bambi who skimmed a ball across the edge of the blacks’ box for George to side-foot home. As good as it gets!!

With the football reaching greater heights it would only be a matter of time before one of the teams would crack under the relentless pressure. Hold your breath, Bambi receives the ball on the right wing, jinks right and then left, rides a scything tackle from Keef and lays the ball on a plate for Breck….surely…. but no, the ball slides off Breck’s boot past the post. A game changing moment?

Dave (the Owl) scores another hat-trick for the blacks and surely puts his name in the frame for SPOTY. However, with the scores level and the game in the balance, no-one would have anticipated the extraordinary events which were to decide this titanic struggle. With the clock ticking down the reds seem to have defused another blacks attack down the right flank. However, with Dave shepherding the ball back to the keeper (Steve), tragedy struck. Nobody really knows what happened, other than it was in slow motion….we all lost a year of our lives as Dave’s back pass agonisingly trickled past Steve’s despairing dive and crawled over the line. Game over man!

What a game. Final Score reds 4-5 Blacks.