Benalmadena 3rd February

Match reports by H and Rory

“The blacks park the 68 Bus!”. Match report by Rory

Welcome to another inspiring morning of incisive pass and move soccerball. On paper the reds looked physically imposing. Fortunately for the blacks, the game was being played on synthetic grass, which helped even up the teams. The reds “all stars” had big Al leading the line, ably supported by Owl Dave in the hole and Irish Dave who had added two new carbon fibre extensions to his legs, thereby shrinking the pitch still further. At the back, the reds had Steve, who drifts effortlessly across the pitch, languidly pinging the ball to set up the next attack. Returner Colin showed what a great touch he had, and Olaf with his usual efficiency (Editor: is that a national stereotype?) made some surging runs down the right flank.

What the blacks lacked in physical presence they made up for in tactical nous. Dazza started in goal, as his synapse reprogramming hadn’t quite been completed. Newcomer Shaun was resplendent in his Wolves 25^th away shirt, and Mark had a free role up front. Kevin adopted his usual attacking wing-back play and Johan went full Anders Limpar (AIK 1998-99) playing through the midfield and captaining the team. Up front George (USA! USA!) provided the usual robust forward play, with Rory slotting in behind looking to feed off George’s lay-offs.

Surprisingly, the blacks dominated the early exchanges and looked dangerous going forward. George’s fluorescent boots were clearly providing a distraction, as a number of opportunities opened up, although to no avail. Johan energetically (Editor: is that a metaphor for running?) played through the midfield and set up a number of chances which were saved, or more commonly were booted miles wide of the goal. The blacks eventually worked a good move involving Rory, Johan and eventually Mark who had ghosted into a pocket of space in the inside left position. Under pressure from the reds’ defence Mark kept his head and curled the ball into the bottom corner. 1-0 to the blacks!

The shock early lead for the blacks gave them the confidence to press forward for a second, and sure enough following a neat exchange of passes between Dazza and Johan, Mark sprung the defensive back line and didn’t need a second invitation to drill in his second. 2-0 to the blacks! But dear readers, if you thought the game was over you had another thing coming. As the game wore on the reds started to dominate. Owl Dave started making intelligent runs into the heart of the blacks’ defensive line, with Olaf stretching them wide and big Al forcing his way through the middle the ball fell to Colin on the edge of the box, and his assured touch didn’t let him down. With one fluid movement Colin fired the ball past the advancing keeper. Game on!!

Shaun, who had been putting in a solid Derek Parkin (Wolves 1968-82) performance dropped into goal for the last quarter which was to usher in an onslaught on the blacks’ goal. The blacks were starting to tire after their early exertions and Irish Dave started to feed big Al with even more shooting opportunities. With Kevo out of goal, prompting wave after wave of attack, it seemed like it would only be a matter of time before the reds levelled the scores. Against the run of play, the blacks managed to break out of defence through their usual conduit Kevin, down the left. The ball was swept to the right where some nice work from George and Dazza delivered the ball into the path of Rory. The cerebrally challenged midfield dynamo finally managed to hit a shot on target beyond Steve’s despairing full-length dive. 3-1 to the blacks. Would it be enough?

With Irish Dave being refuelled with his mysterious cyclist “energy” drink (Editor: I’m sure I saw a blood transfusion unit in reception), the blacks were being pinned back in front of goal. And with big Al being even bigger and more Al, the blacks were under the cosh. However, Captain Johan managed to secure the 68 Trafalgar Square to Plumstead bus which he promptly parked in front of the beleaguered blacks’ goal. Even then, Shaun had to pull off a string of fine saves to survive big Al’s bombardment, more shots than a Suffolk Young Farmers Clay Pigeon Shooting weekend. Kevin continued to provide a welcome outlet for the blacks down the left, but Mark had suffered some thigh knock and was unable to provide support for the increasingly isolated George up front.

Owl Dave was starting to weave his magic through the despairing blacks’ tackles but the reds still couldn’t find the goal. That is until a neat bit of passing involving Irish Dave and Olaf down the right. Dave fired the ball into the advancing big Al who swept it past the previously unbeatable Shaun. The goal of the match. 3-2 to the blacks. The game morphed into attack vs defence with Kevo pulling the strings on a number of sweeping attacks on the blacks’ goal. Could the blacks hold on? Shaun pulled off a string of fine saves to defy the reds and both Johan and Rory had the red marks of courage on their legs where they had blocked big Al’s thunderbolts. To the despair of the blacks, Kevo added on Fergie-time, believing that the reds would surely score another goal. However, the blacks established the best redoubt since the Zulu attack on Rorkes Drift in 1879 and managed to cling on for a 3-2 victory.

Another brilliant game at the Polideportivo. Farewell to Irish Dave who has secured a loan deal with Shamrock Rovers until the end of the season.

Cherries…3 versus Blacks…3 Match report by H

On yet another excellent turnout at the Polideportivo on a hot and sunny Thursday morning resulted in master of  ceremonies ’Keef’ having to arrange two six a side matches using the small hockey nets thereby making scoring more difficult. This despite ‘Keef’ having to overcome slight technical difficulties of his own making having deleted the provisional match list off his computer causing him a last minute panic.

As normal in the ‘old farts’ game which included a few youngsters carrying knocks Keef ensured latecomer Ken making a welcome return was in his Cherry Pickers team thereby giving them the extra player and the Blacks the younger minor casualties. No fool our Keef!

The first 25 minutes was goalless until Mike put the Blacks in front with a slick goal from short range somewhat against the run of play.  Shortly afterwards Dave 🐝 equalised for the Cherries following poor defending by the Blacks who had Dave🚕 playing ‘rush’ goalie due to being a player short. The Blacks then took the lead again though Dave🚕 who had had enough of playing ‘rush’ goalie and despite his hamstring injury struck a powerful shot into the opposition net.

Pete🐠 for the second match running again showed his improved scoring prowess hitting another fine goal from a tight angle making the score all square.

Yet another defensive error by the Blacks allowed the 🐝 from Brentford to get his second goal putting the Cherries in front.

Breck despite carrying a slight injury equalised for the Blacks ensuring the match finished 3 apiece. A fair result for an entertaining game despite Keef’s dodgy team selection!

Everyone from both matches as is normal then retired for ‘lemonade’ drinks on the bar balcony after a thoroughly enjoyable morning.