Thursday 22nd May

Match 1 report by Colin

You can always tell when Franks away, the quality and quantity of photos drops. 

Taking a second to study the team lineup we have Fred proudly highlighting the red half of North London and Steve playing peekaboo. 

Game 1 went like this…..

 The white half of North London was represented by the 2 Graham’s playing in Black, plus Sam, son of Graham, who was trainee ball boy, though Geoff wasn’t overly impressed with his ball retrieval skills, I think Trevor in red had a Spursy looking shirt under his bib as well.

 An even sided game of 7 v 6 was low in goalscoring, but inspired by last night’s spectacle the 2 Graham’s were channeling their inner Hoddle, knocking balls around with flicks and back heals aplenty.

 Graham was the first on the score sheet and with son Sam looking on Graham took the ball with his first touch, let it bounce off his thigh with the second and then pinged it in with the 3rd.

 2-0 became 2-1 when Ken left unmarked scored a typical screamer.

 A second Ken goal had to be disallowed for breaching most of the rules so it ended 2-1 Blacks.

 Post game we were curtailed in our usual drinking zone with the local badminton group having been displaced for one game and sharing our terrace.

 An embarrassment was avoided when Rory and Sean appeared from the changing rooms asking if some clothes belonged to anyone, with no replies it was felt best to return them. Just as well when we saw said clothes smartly modelled by one of the badminton players

 With the end of June in about 5 weeks time the season is gradually closing in as the Polideportivo is commandeered by the school holiday youth groups 

 Colin will hopefully be fit enough to play next week so game 1 will be without a referee unless anyone wants to go on a rotation, offers in the comment section below.

Match 2 report by Rory

Summer had well and truly arrived at the Poli with two good teams lined up against each other in game 2. There are now so many rules to the game that they have to be transported around in medium sized articulated truck, simultaneously damaging the Amazon rain forest and the fragile ozone layer. All players vowed that they had read the rules, but this was clearly a lie as they obviously hadn’t and they hadn’t been translated into Hungarian, so Jonny was clearly at a disadvantage.

Both sides were relieved to know that our Keef had taken up Holy Orders and a vow of silence for the game and that Dazza in particular wouldn’t get his ears roasted. With Steve not playing it also meant there wouldn’t be any arguments and subsequent threats of violence. Game on!

Although at first sight the blacks looked marginally stronger, it was the reds who had the best of the initial exchanges with the ball being pinged around with abandon and no small degree of accuracy. The blacks had the deadly goalscoring duo of Boro reject Fez and the evil goal poacher Dave the Fox (aka Vardyman). However, the reds early midfield dominance prevented the deadly duo from getting a sniff of the ball which was lucky for them because it smelled like it had been kept in a bag with a dead ferret for a month. Kevo, Keef and Lawrence were playing some neat one-touch tic-a-tac footie to keep the blacks chasing shadows.

The reds managed to force Rory into making a couple of good saves with Lawrence and Rick (yes that Rick!) both testing out the keeper’s ability to stop the ball without doing any long-term damage to his digits. At the other end, Eddie in the red’s goal had a quiet first quarter and was able to resume his crocheting while the blacks tried to get their act together. Super Dave dropped into goal, allowing Rory to move into midfield in the hope that he could finally get some service to Fez and Dave the Fox. Dave wasn’t having his best day in front of goal, casually missing a few sitters to add to the black’s frustration. Maybe it was because he was playing in the hole and couldn’t quite see over the top.

The blacks were finally allowed back into it when Dazza made the classic walking football error by passing the ball across the face of the goal. 70 percent of all walking football goals are the result of some plonker passing it across the goal (Opta Stats). Sure enough, who should be waiting there but deadly goalsmith Fez to knock the ball home with his right peg, which he usually only uses for standing on. Sean kept finding himself in good goalscoring positions which was unfortunate for the blacks as Eddie didn’t have to put his crochet needles down to deal with any of his wayward shooting.

With Pete keeping things tight at the back the reds had fewer clearcut chances, enabling the blacks to dominate the middle part of the game. Dave the Fox finally realised that he had his boots on the wrong feet, and after a quick change banged in his first goal past Eddy was still in his rocking chair as the ball fizzed past him. However, his lovely, crocheted scarf was coming along nicely. Reds 1-2 Blacks

Fez bagged himself a brace after being put through by Dave and nicely sending Eddy the wrong way to make it reds 1-3 blacks. Although it looked like the blacks had the game in the bag, our Keef continued to run relentlessly around the pitch looking for a weakness in the blacks’ defence. To make matters worse for the reds, Dazza was sent to the sin bin for 2 minutes for failing to control the football…again. Both sides were noticeably tiring in the heat and at one point actually started playing walking football as opposed to the running version they had been playing up until then.

Most players know that when Rick lines up a shot there is a 0.0001 percent chance of it going anywhere near the goal. So it wasn’t a surprise when no-one on the blacks’ team looked to close him down when he swung his right peg at the ball. Remarkably it ended up in the top corner of the net, even taking superkeeper Dave by surprise as he waved at it admiringly when it shot past him into the net.  This was precisely the inspirational moment the reds needed to get them back in the game. Unfortunately, following a nice period of possession, their hopes were crushed by the evil goalscoring Vardyman who seized on a loose ball on the edge of the box and fired it past Eddy. Reds 2-4 Blacks.

The reds refused to give up and were right back in it when Duracel powered Lawrence bore down on goal and fired it past the keeper from distance, setting up a frenetic last five minutes of excitement (not really). Reds 3-4 Blacks

Well done everyone, another close game played in a good spirit. And thanks to John for reffing.

Thursdays mini video available here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCmuzv4gTAI