Time until the Next game at Benalmadena Polideportivo

Match 1 report from Geoff

Blacks ….5  v  Reds ….3

Another excellent turn out at the Polideportivo, with two more newbie’s in Paul and Stacey, albeit they were actually playing in the so called elite squad, refereed by Fireman Sam.

The day didn’t get off to a brilliant start due to an unfortunate misunderstanding by your ace reporter when collecting the subs.

This by way of giving the majority of players the incorrect bib colours.

To-date, Keef has always given the first named team column as playing in Red.

However, to prove his  point that your reporter is a dickhead, on this occasion changed it to Black.

Consequently, I told the majority of players the wrong colour, even though they were adamant I was wrong.

Most of them, for once having read the team sheet on the clubs What’s App.

I politely told them, I’m never wrong, don’t argue and get changed!

When realising my error, I nevertheless thought I had got the last laugh, with  Keef having  to tell most of the players by now on the pitch ready to play, to change their bibs. This, in addition to others having to change bibs due to late drop outs and arrivals.

As you can imagine, I was not by now a happy bunny, especially when taking the team photograph, only then to be told make it snappy!

Now to the report of the old farts match.

The Leicester Fox put the Blacks one goal up in the first session.

He added another shortly into second session, this  after a misplaced back pass by Kevin, to the Commander in the Reds goal.

2-0 to Blacks.

The Fox then scored his hat trick with a well placed shot, sending the Commander in goal  the wrong way.

The latter’s day was now going from bad to worse, especially as being an avid Leeds fan letting his nemesis from Leicester getting the better of him.

3-0 to Blacks.

The cavalry then arrived for the Reds, this in the form of El Tel, who had been delayed due to a late delivery at his restaurant.

Allegedly, the footie boys had drunk his bar dry at their  annual  San Juan celebrations over the weekend.

Almost immediately, the Reds got a penalty, when Ian, in goal for the Blacks picked  the ball up out of his area.

Being Swedish, Ian’s emoji is aptly a Swede or to some a Turnip.

Nice to see there is more than one dickhead playing football at the Polideportivo this morning.

Cometh the hour cometh the man, up stepped Big Jim from the granite city,to take the penalty, blasting the ball into the back of the Blacks net.

3-1

Then the goal of the match by Gert, he started the move in his own half of the pitch, then made to look good by some intricate passing by his teammates, to then finish it off with some aplomb, hitting the ball into the back of the Reds net.

4-1 to Blacks.

Then El Tel, rallying his troops scored a terrific  individual goal for the Reds.

4-2 to Blacks.

This goal was quickly followed with another from Jim for the Reds.

4-3 to Blacks.

Game now on and the Blacks beginning to panic in the closing minutes of the match.

With the Reds now pressing hard for the equaliser, they left Keef unmarked in their half, Taking full advantage of being unmarked, receiving the ball he had only the Commander to beat.

The latter tried a Bruce Grobbelaar shuffle in an endeavour to put Keef off, anticipating him shooting to his right, he stuck his foot out to block the shot.

No fooling our Keef, grinning he nutmegged the Commander to score, just to completely make his day but not your reporters!

5-3 to Blacks.

Match played in a sporting spirit throughout, this despite some dodgy decisions by Keef as unofficial referee.

 

Match report 2 by Rory

In the slightly faster game on the far side of the Poli, the boys had gleefully abandoned any pretence of running, and decided to run around for the full 5 minutes until they ran out of steam and settled down to a sensible walking pace in the intense heat. Fireman John had the challenging job of trying to keep things under control, but as things stood, he rarely had to blow his whistle as the aged ball prodders had finally wised up to the fact that it wasn’t a great idea to kick your mates.

The boys welcomed Paul and Stacey to the game, both of whom had piledriver shots attached to their boots. Fortunately they were on opposite teams. The reds were a powerful unit, with Paul and the athletic, long-legged Alex backed up by midfield maestro Mats and superfit Kaj, who wasn’t going to tire easily. Rick and his hair were playing right wing-back, with Prak playing on the left.

Although smaller in stature, the blacks had some big players with wee Eddie leading the line. Dazza started in goal, thereby guaranteeing the opposition at least two giveaway goals. Stacey was holding midfielder with Steve drifting aimlessly through the middle looking for every opportunity to start a debate about the ball being over head height. Dave the cab started at the back with a licence to move into attacking midfield when the blacks were gengen pressing. Al took up his usual right-wing position where he can Gnonto his way in on goal. Rory was in midfield where he could orchestrate the blacks and hold the line against the powerful reds’ lineup.

The game started off at high speed, although it quickly settled down as the boys soon ran out of puff in the searing heat. The blacks were the first to draw blood with a great move involving Steve finding wee Eddie on the goal line and the diminutive scot fizzing a great ball across the goal to pick out Rory who side footed first time past a bronze statue of a keeper in the reds’ goal.

The reds hit back with some great work from Paul and Kaj to put in Alex who rarely misses when through on goal. Blacks 1-1 Reds. Eddie, who had been looking dangerous for the blacks calmly put away a good through ball from Al to make it Blacks 2-1 Reds

Although the reds were beginning to become more dominant, the blacks defence was solid with Dave having another solid game with surprising few tackles from behind. He was well supported by Stacey and Rick plus his hair. The reds were putting together some fluid passing and moving with Mats pulling the strings in midfield, and Kai providing some energetic runs to open up some space for his team mates. Dave was doing a good job of keeping Paul quiet (he trussed him up and put him in the boot of his car), but just as the blacks looked like they could comfortably fend of the reds’ attacks Stacey became a bit over-excited and wandered into the penalty area. Eagle eyed John spotted it immediately and pointed to the spot on Stacey’s shirt before giving a penalty. Rory was the unfortunate sacrificial lamb in goal as Paul stepped up to take the penalty. Rory was quickly given his last rites but miraculously managed to dive out of the way of Paul’s thunderbolt, which sent a sonic wave through the atmosphere and knocked a solar panel off the passing international space station. Blacks 2-2 Reds.

Although it was end to end stuff the reds were creating more chances and the Swedes with their neat passing and moving were making the opposition look like turnips. Mats, who had a predilection for root vegetables sauntered forward through the vegetable patch and stylishly planted the ball in the back of the net. Fortunately the boys had a trowel handy and dug it out so that the game could proceed. Blacks 2-3 Reds. The reds were understandably tiring in the heat, and didn’t spot Prak ghosting forward on the left and drifting silently into a big space in front of the blacks goal. He controlled the ball well before sliding it into the net to give the reds a two goal lead. Blacks 2-4 Reds. The blacks were starting to look a bit frayed around the edges, but Eddie the eternal optimist, kept encouraging them forward, feeling that they could still salvage something from the game. Eddie gave the blacks some hope when he was put through on goal by Al and tucked it away as usual, bringing the blacks to within one goal of the reds. Blacks 3-4 Reds

As the game began to stretch because the players were increasingly knackered, Rory ventured forward and was put through on goal by wee Eddie. It took him two strikes, but the ball finally ended up in the net to give the blacks fresh hope. Blacks 4-4 Reds. However, any hope was soon crushed by an ascendant red team, led by Alex who still had some oxygen left in his lungs to get forward to complete his brace. Blacks 4-5 Reds. As the seconds ticked down the blacks had one last attempt to salvage something with Steve prompting some nice moves forward with his pinpoint passing. Steve’s efforts paid off when after another attack on the reds goal the ball broke to little Al on the edge of the box. Despite the tight angle and the pleas from his team mates the greedy …………struck a brilliant shot into the goal to secure a well deserved draw. Final score Blacks 5-5 Reds

Another great game with plenty of running and very few fouls. The game was placed in a great spirit. Thanks to John for keeping everyone in line, which is no mean feat.