6th June

In a match best forgotten, due to a certain player, most definitely not playing walking football within the spirit of the game.

Such matters are not helped when local rules are constantly challenged. For instance, goalies ball, when the keeper kicks or throws the ball and it goes above head height, or likewise when making a save or clearance, then the  goalie should get the ball back.

Also, if a shot deflects high off a player, then advantage can be played.

To this end, allowances for certain other things like running or stepping in the goal area for certain players are ignored by the majority of us at the Polideportivo.

Albeit, in such instances discretion is normally used should a goal be scored.

To this end, it was disappointing to see our eldest regular member, now turned 80 years of age leave the field of play in a somewhat distraught manner towards the end of this 6 aside match, This, no doubt as a result of derogatory remarks aimed at the aforementioned person during the match, for any such occurrences.

This, in no way, was banter!

Fortunately, after a shower and in the bar afterwards,  Ken had no recollection of such matters and enjoyed a beer.

Due to the heat, water breaks were taken every ten minutes or so.

The first session ended with old stager Ken scoring one of his typical poachers goal sending the Wily Old Fox in the Blacks goal the wrong way.

1-0 to Reds.

In the second session Bambi equalised for the Blacks after an excellent passing movement by  his teammates.

Fish then put the Reds back in front following a superb pass to him from Jim in goal.

2-1 Reds.

Just before the break, a volley from The Fox or was it a toe poke equalised for the Blacks, giving Olaf in goal no chance of saving.

2-2 at the break.

The Fox then claimed his second goal for the Blacks, nicking the ball off H playing rush goalie on the edge of the Reds goal area and tapping it into an empty net.

3-2to Blacks.

In the last session, newbie Jim now playing rush goalie for the Reds decided to go walkabout.

Seeing  this opportunity when receiving the ball, the Leicester Fox struck again for his hat trick shooting into an empty net.

4-2,to Blacks

These two  goal keeping errors in succession undoubtedly costing the Reds the game.

In the closing seconds, a deflected high ball from a shot on goal dropped kindly for Sussex Ken to blast into the back of the Blacks net for a consolation goal.

4-3 to Blacks.

This resulted in Bambi making another petulant rant  and storming off the pitch.

At the final whistle, Sussex  Ken had just enough time to change and have a quick beer before dashing to the airport for his afternoon flight home.

Final Score Reds 3 v Blacks 4.

Man of the match, he told me to mention it Foxy Dave with his 3 goals.

Match report 2 from Rory

As the dawn of another major footballing championship approaches the walking footballers pondered another embarrassing early exit for an England Team comprising a “Golden Generation”. As everyone knows, no team containing Harry Kane is going to win anything, although he will score more goals than any other player living or dead. Meanwhile, a group of old blokes who should probably know better, started another game of footie where they could dream that their talent as a footballer was never recognised when they were young enough to play the game. They could have been a contender!

Back on planet earth, both teams realised they were going to be in a hell of a game, as the elastic band on our Keefs algorithm generator threw out another couple of intriguing teams of toe pokers and tacklers from behind. Our Keef was in black, and as you might expect, he picked the 25-year-old multi-appendaged and all round skill goblin Alex, in his team. El Buho, who holds the record for the number of assists in one game was sat in his usual stealth position just behind hot shot Dave the Bee up front. Meanwhile, Duracell charged (our) Keef trotted randomly about the pitch, creating some good angles for his teammates. Hungarian ball wizard Johnny brought some defensive solidity alongside Plymouth’s answer to Norman Hunter, Pete the pirate.

The reds had a solid defence with (walking not running) Dave making sure no-one would pass, and if they did, they’d have to make full use of their medical insurance. He was aided and abetted by Dodri and his plaintiff cries of “play the easy ball”. As always this fell on deaf ears as the walkers would rather try to play a 40-yard ball through a mass of opposition legs and give away a goal. Glyn took up his usual centre forward role giving a good impersonation of another Man Utd forward incapable of hitting the back of the net. The skilful Olympic debating champion gold medallist Steve hovered in midfield alongside Rory who was playing in the “hole”, or that’s   his excuse for not being able to kick the ball properly. Martin settled in at right mid, mistakenly believing that his underlying injury wouldn’t come back to haunt him.

The game started well, with some intricate passing and moving from both sides, although the reds probably had the slight edge having decided to adhere to Rodri’s encouragement to play the simple ball. As usual, neither goal was under much threat, although the boys were certainly enjoying themselves. Steve had taken a vow of silence, prior to taking up Holy Orders and as a result, there were no debates about whether the ball was over head height. What a game….if you had nothing better to do than watch paint dry.

The reds took an early lead, which their confident build-up play had warranted. A nice passing interchange managed to find Rory in front of goal and he duly banged the ball past the marble statue that had somehow taken up a position in goal. Reds 1-0 Blacks

Dave the Bee was his usual dynamic self up front for the blacks and had had a number of early half-chances before scoring a lovely guided volley past the red’s keeper after being put through by a great ball from Alex. Reds 1-1 Blacks.

The heat was certainly being turned up by both sides in a game that was pacey, but also extraordinarily good natured. The reds suffered a blow when cultured ball player Martin twanged a muscle in his leg and had to manfully hobble into goal for the rest of the game. Even with a painful appendage, he managed to pull off a series of stunning saves to keep the reds in it, as Alex, prompted by the energetic (our) Keef, kept the pressure on the reds. Following some nice hold up play from Glyn the ball broke loose on the edge of the blacks’ box. With both Steve and Rory converging on the ball, Steve managed to get out of the way in time for Rory to scuff the ball along the ground and into the goal off the post. In a finely balanced game, this looked like a crucial breakthrough for the reds. Reds 2-1 Blacks. However, with Alex looking increasingly dangerous and Johnny putting through some great balls, the lead started to look vulnerable despite one-legged Martin’s best efforts. The scores were level when Alex opened his legs and showed his class, dummying the defender and moving the ball onto his deadly left foot before he struck it beautifully past Martin who could do nothing in the goal. Reds 2-2 Blacks.

Then came the goal of the match. The reds were pressing forward for a winner which their skilful play had marginally warranted. However, the blacks were holding firm until the ball broke into space, and rather than take it on himself, Steve left it for the onrushing Dodri, who struck the ball with the outside of his foot from 20 yards out and curled it into the top corner. What a goal! Reds 3-2 Blacks.

As the clock ticked down, Dave was running the reds ragged at the back and opening up some gaps for his teammates to run (walk) into. Some great passing from Alex and (our) Keef split the reds’ defence and sent El Buho through on goal. Everyone knows that El Buho is the fastest player in the league over three feet, and he burst into the space created by Dave to sweetly strike the ball into the corner of the net. What a game and a well deserved draw. Everyone was well behaved and there were no arguments of note. Well played lads. Final score Reds 3-3 Blacks.