Time until the Next game at Benalmadena Polideportivo
Another tremendous turnout on Thursday at the Polideportivo, with one seven aside match and another 6 aside match.
The latter game made up of old farts, namely the aged, those less able and others recovering from injury.
In Breck’s enforced absence, Keef continued with the trial of unlimited touches with the ball for this match.
This decision seemed to go down well with the majority of players, other than several unable to count more than three!
Because of the heat and it being a six a side match rush goalkeepers were again allowed, with water breaks every ten minutes or so.
This latter ruling for some reason appeared to cause problems for Bambi, accusing Keef of calling them every time the Reds had a corner and therefore in a good attacking position.
Classic Bambi or should I say Keef!
A warm welcome was given by everyone to Glaswegian Martyn, who celebrated his debut with a well taken goal to put the Reds one up.
Old stager Ken, equalising for the Blacks before the first water break with one of his typical poachers goals.
1-1
At the start of the next session, Ken who has been in prolific goal scoring form of late, put the Blacks 2-1 up, a lead that they held onto until the break.
The next session began with Bambi, taking great delight in putting one past ‘H’ in goal to bring the score level.
2-2
By now both teams were feeling the effects of the hot morning sun, welcoming every water break as if they had found an oasis in the desert.
In the closing stages, both teams went close to scoring in an effort to get the winning goal.
First to strike went to the Blacks, with the undoubted goal of the match.
Jim, another newbie, receiving a terrific through pass from Boris, hit an exquisite shot into the back of the Reds goal.
3-2 to Blacks.
The Leicester Fox, then spoilt the short lived euphoria of the Blacks by scoring the equaliser with a scuffed shot past ‘H’ in goal. 3-3.
An enjoyable game, played under glorious sunshine was brought to a close.
This much to the relief of everyone, especially Martyn who two days previously had been in the freezing climes of Scotland.
All in all on the balance of play a fair result.
FT: 3-3
Keef, defying his age, now a nimble 70 year old cajoled the best out of his team, especially 78 year old Boris.
Likewise as did Nigel and the Foxy Dave for the Reds.
Everyone then retired to the balcony bar for drinks, tasting all the better thanks to Dodri’s generosity, celebrating his 67th birthday.
Match 2 Report by Rory
Abra cad Abra – Glyn transfers a solid object through time and space yet fails to score.
Well, it was another tedious day at the footie with substitute team picker (our) Keef demonstrating he was equally inept at picking a couple of well-matched teams as our sadly absent Breck. Still, life is too short to bemoan getting your arse kicked on the pitch when you were able to be present at one of the best magic tricks since David Copperfield elevated the statue of Liberty in 1986. (Our) Keef introduced some innovative new thinking by setting the blacks against the reds.
Well, what about the teams. First up, wannabee triathlete Kaj (who you remember was sent back from the future by Sky-Net to kill “what’s his name” and ultimately destroy mankind etc etc) was happy to be back amongst humankind and settled into his new centre forward position. He was irritatingly supported by (walking not running) Dave the cab, who had a bit of a blinder (but I wouldn’t want to work for him). Glyn (now, the greatest magician that has ever lived), was playing up front. With Jonny, Klaus and Laurence sitting deep, they looked impenetrable.
Meanwhile, the blacks had assembled a team which looked vaguely coherent on paper but were an accident waiting to happen. Their first mistake was to put Steve in goal. I mean c’mon, what did you think was going to happen. The blacks had the full enthusiasm of Alvin who, because he has short legs, thinks that he isn’t running, when he is. But that is still an asset to any team. Dodri was his usual imperious self, pleading for his ignorant team mates to “play the simple ball”….if only they were semi-articulate and able to listen to Dodri’s straightforward instructions? But it wasn’t to be. As is de riguer, the blacks had a ball playing Dutchman in the team, but Gerd merely demonstrated why they ain’t going to get anywhere in the Euros. Pigs in wardrobes ball magician Olaf took up his usual position on the right flank and guitar hero Rick played in his usual position, which was no position. What could possibly go wrong?
Well readers, you may not know this, but most of the guys think they’re pretty good at football. Dream on suckers! The first quarter was pants as the aged ball bashers carefully set out to demonstrate they were capable of actually kicking the ball to each other…snore zzz. The game was suddenly transformed when Klaus (nominated for the most improved player in 2024) wellied the ball aimlessly into the stratosphere, simultaneously taking out the EE satellite and ruining our phone signal for the next two days. Anyway, while Steve was distracted and scrolling through some concert footage of Taylor Swift, Klaus’s attempt to land a football on the dark side of the moon returned into earth’s orbit and dropped past the oldest Swiftee’s nose and into the net. What a shocker! Reds 1-0 Blacks.
Well, you could have heard a pin drop if everyone had turned their hearing aids up. The blacks soon realised that endless amounts of enthusiasm couldn’t compensate for a basic lack of footballing competence. The reds, led by Dave soon imposed their superior passing ability on the blacks. Their deft passing and movement opened up the blacks, and it wasn’t long before the floodgates opened and the goals started to flow. Worst of all, the T800 cyborg was programmed to score goals, even with his right foot, which was only previously used to stand on, and strangle to death any humanoid rebels. The reds built a great move with Laurence, Dave the cab and el buho ripping through the blacks’ defences before el buho slid the ball past the reds’ keeper. The T800 then pulled out a couple of great goals, one of which was a great volley following a heroic save by Dodri in the reds’ goal. Reds 4-0 Blacks. It was looking like a massacre before Steve partially redeemed himself by scoring a great chip from the half-way line as Jonny and his teammates discussed tactics. Reds 4-1 Blacks. The plucky reds kept plucking and eventually found a way through the Arsenal like defending by the reds. Following a great through ball from Steve, yours truly punted a ball past the reds’ keeper to ensure the score ended moderately respectable, even though it was a real drubbing. Reds 4-2 Blacks.
Fortunately, after the game, Glyn admitted he’d joined the magic circle and proceeded to show us a trick where he loses his keys, we all search the pitch and drains, he goes through his bag a million times and they’ve disappeared. Wonder of wonders, the said precious keys reappear in the shoes he has walked home in. Who would have thunk it! Well obvs, the keys couldn’t have been in his shoes all along?? It had to be a trick which defied all the laws of science. Wonders never cease.
Brilliant reports both of you.